What is it about Gustave?

I've been thinking.  I've noticed a common theme among fairytale stories (or at least the spruced-up Cinderella stories... and I mean two of them).  Nevertheless, there is a commonality that I think is important.

 Gustave, from Ever After

 Carter, from A Cinderella Story

Have you guessed it yet?  That's right, a supporting man.

Danielle had Gustave.  Sam had Carter.  Bella had Jacob (okay, we all know how that one turned about, but give me this one).  Lizzie McGuire had Gordo.  The list goes on and on.  Why is this important?

Because every girl loves the supporting guy.  We all secretly root for him and hopes Prince Charming ends up with the evil step sister/bratty cheerleader.  Heaven knows he's usually stuck up enough to deserve her.  The loyal boy-next-door deserves the girl, and that's that.

So why am I blogging about this tonight?  Because I love the supporting guys in my own Cinderella story.  I love that I have guy friends that will talk with me until 1 in the morning while our rear ends freeze to my porch step, who will sit with me in a car while I cry about something relatively meaningless.  I love those friends that teach me how to play video games, who come to my house in the middle of the night to give me hugs, who patiently sit with me while I curse the deadly knight-and-queen combo that ALWAYS puts me in checkmate, and then sets up the board again.  The friends that tell me if a guy doesn't appreciate me for who I am, that he's an idiot, that I will get my fairytale.

The friends that write "Happy Birthday!" on my car in rocks, that take me shooting when I'm frustrated, that tease me about crazy hair days-- but always tell me that I'm beautiful when it counts.  The friends who dance with me when they don't want to be at the stupid dance in the first place.  The friends who will eat mac-n-cheese with me when I put taco stuff in it... and actually thinks it tastes good.  Those who will cook with me, tell me my cookies are delicious, give me rides, text me until I fall asleep when I'm upset...

Yeah, those are my supporting guys.  They're the guys that give me the hope and courage I need to step into those glass slippers and straighten my tiara.  The ones who have that special smile when you're about to do something scary (like go on a date) and they tell you that you're beautiful, that they will kill the kid if he so much as touches you, and that you'll be just fine.  God has a special place in His kingdom reserved for men like the ones that I have grown to love so very much.

So... thank you.  You know who you are.

Consider yourself hugged.

Life's Little Lessons

 It's been a little while.  I've found that when I've got a lot of learning to do (not necessarily a lot going on), I don't blog/write as much.  I think writing helps me to organize the crazy thoughts that run rampant through my mind.  So if I'm organizing those thoughts on my own, writing gets overlooked.

Anyway, I'll update you on the comings and goings of Kaylee.

But first and most importantly, check out my awesome picture!

See a resemblance?  That's okay, I didn't either.  But I took that picture while I ran back to my summer apartment and spent the weekend with my old roommate.  She studies dental hygiene so she "just so happens" to have a skull in her closet.  Not to mention a model of a mouth that you can pull the teeth out of.  SUPER gross, really, but kind of sickeningly satisfying to pull the teeth out of "someone's" mouth.

Anywho:  

Grad school = Still no word yet.  Not really surprised, but... still anxious.  I'll make sure to keep you updated.

Institute:  I freaking love institute.  Unfortunately, there was a fire in the institute, so they closed it for a couple of days, but it will be up and running tomorrow!  YAY!  I'm looking forward to it. :)

Dating:  Oh yes, I know you're all anxiously wondering how my love life is going.

Well, it's not going.  =D

For January I decided I needed to do a dating fast and not go on any dates for the month.  I'm not going to lie, I wanted to do it to kind of de-stress and not have to go on dates... But I ended up learning a lot of important things.  I have learned a lot about myself and what I want for dating.

For example... I want to have fun!  Dating seems so darn serious alllll the time.  I think my generation has really missed out on dating and courtship.  We go on a handful of dates and then people expect it to get serious.  What's wrong with just going on a date for fun?  Just because you can?

And just because you like someone doesn't mean you have to date them.  It might just mean you like someone.  And that's okay!  Eventually, yes, the goal of dating is to be serious and get married, but... I don't want marriage to be serious all the time... so I don't think my dating should be either.

I've also learned that, though it's good to change and try to grow, that being YOU is very, very important.  I'm the only ME I have, and while I want it to be the best ME there is, I want it to remain purely KAYLEE.

"In the midst of winter, I finally learned that there was in me an invincible summer."
                --Albert Camus

Grad School

There is a light at the end of the tunnel!  My professor turned in the letter of recommendation (SuH-wEeT!), my letter of intent is done and being revised... Everything else is GOLDEN!  Ah, so excited.

Pretty much, this is going to be awesome.

UPDATE:  I have officially submitted my application.  BoooooYAH!  What a good feeling!  I hope everything's in (it should be), but man, am I glad to be done! (even though I still have another school, but the first is always the hardest, right?)  After hitting the "Submit Application" button I thought I was going to vomit for about 15 minutes after, but nothing like a little internship paperwork filing to knock the feeling right out of you!

Therapy

These give me perspective.

This tastes yummy and makes me happy.

This makes everything better.

He gives me giddy, happy feelings inside.

And now I get to go do this.

Be Still, My Soul

I was sitting here in my room just now feeling kind of sorry for myself.  I feel frustrated with the changes that are happening (and the ones that are NOT happening), kind of just wishing everything would right itself.  I know things don't work that way, but... a girl can hope.

I was thinking about how I don't know if I'll get into BYU, how I don't know what I'll do if I don't get into grad school, how I don't want to end up working in food or retail for the rest of my life, how I miss my best friend (x2), how I miss my old ward on campus and how we used to always do stuff together.  I was thinking about how when I set a "goal" that's important to me, but it makes others upset or feel bad or something, that I feel like I have to drop it.  Even when it's important to me.  I was thinking about the process of being social and how it would be good for me to get out more and do more things, but hate meeting new people because I get so incredibly, painfully shy around them.

I was thinking about marriage and how I've only caught a glimpse of it once... and it took me a really long time to get to that point.  "Only the deepest love will persuade me into matrimony."  I am not patient, as you may have guessed.

Then, as I was laying back on my bed, I thought of the blessing that Bro. Hunsaker gave me a while back where it said to, "Calm your spirit."  The blessing said a lot about letting go of the anxiety I had at the time... And I thought of how I probably needed the same thing again.

And then I heard the music that was softly playing in the background:

Be still, my soul: The Lord is on thy side;
With patience bear thy cross of grief or pain.
Leave to thy God to order and provide;
In ev'ry change, he faithful will remain.
Be still, my soul: Thy best, thy heav'nly Friend
Thru thorny ways leads to a joyful end.

Be still, my soul: Thy God doth undertake
To guide the future as he has the past.
Thy hope, thy confidence let nothing shake;
All now mysterious shall be bright at least.
Be still, my soul: The waves and winds still know
His voice who ruled them while he dwelt below.

Be still, my soul: The hour is hast'ning on
When we shall be forever with the Lord,
When disappointment, grief, and fear are gone,
Sorrow forgot, love's purest joys restored.
Be still, my soul: When change and tears are past,
All safe and blessed we shall meet at last.

It was kind of perfect.  It talks about change, the future, fear, tears, disappointment, confidence, the "mysterious now" becoming bright... at last!, patience... and Be still, my soul. Calm your spirit.  The Lord is there.  He's constant when change and disappointment run rampant.  No matter how chaotic the world may seem and feel, the waves and winds still know who is God.  They still obey His word.

*deep breath*

It'll be okay.

Year With Christ

I'm starting a new project for 2012.

It's here. :)

Check it out.

P.S.  Don't judge the first awkward post.  It's harder to start one of these than it looks.